The various proposals that exist today in the songs, movies, literature and novels speak of love, breaking up, they die, they crave it. It appears that the identification of love as a couple, is always related to pain and suffering. One of those loves is addictive. Words, words less, Antonio Machado said: "Neither you nor without you, they cure my pain, because you kill me, and without you, because I'm dying."

T hese are examples of poetic words clearly and precisely what it refers to a love that has fallen into the addiction. But what is an addiction? It is a behavior by which the person loses his will and left to dominate, even harmful, although it is slowly killing him. So love becomes addictive and becomes sticky, destructive to the sufferer. The addictive love realizes that his relationship with a partner is slowly destroying him, and yet can not quit. In addition to suffering all the symptoms of withdrawal when not with the object of addiction.

The addictive love the person suffers from the absence and in presence of their partner. Anyway suffering and pain of their condition. You can override anything to be always stuck to their relationship.

In the presence of addictive love we are capable of deceiving us, to devalue, even immolate good so as not to lose our love. And when we do not, we suffer, we die, we cry and the meaning of life seems lost.

Amar also requires a couple of independence, but when the couple becomes indispensable in our life when I need love to be "good", then, a problem of dependency, can not live without that love. It subverts all , life, work, other relationships, pastimes. And little by little, self-destruction and the ravages of abuse are not left waiting.

Tolerate humiliation, lack of interest, we justify our partners, we feel guilt, we believe that we are responsible for our relationship does not work. We try to give a number of explanations. The problem is not with my partner, it is not in denial, but lies at the root of my understanding of love.

The love of the couple and the couple relationship, events or circumstances are not equal. The ways of expressing love can be diverse, destructive, constructive, dependence, humiliation, aggressive. One way to love is still addicted to this.

Moreover, it seems that the addictive relationship are trying to fill needs and gaps, which have nothing to do with the couple. Yes you are living a relationship in which you can not let go of a destructive love, you're probably going through a love addictive behavior.

If you can pass over you, tolerate abuse, aversion and indifference, and yet you still believe you love your partner and you can not do without it. Perhaps you are involved in a relationship with addictive properties, it which causes immense suffering in your life.

What then are the characteristics of an addictive love?

  • The obsession: constantly thinking, feeling and loving a partner who will probably not appropriate.
  • Becoming irrational that the couple want everything and we cover all the time, otherwise, suffer intensely.
  • The requirement: either you love me or love me, or I love you or I love you, otherwise I can not do anything else with my life.
  • Strong emotional dependency: life, affection, comfort and discomfort are focused on what happens to me and it happens around my love and my partner.
  • Jealousy incomprehensible that the couple does not tolerate nor I have a life. We become suspicious of everything. We followed him, interrogate him, always have doubts of their behavior.
  • The idealization: only the couple can give us what we need, well, that I am the only person who can love him or love is needed.

Psychologically we become insecure, anxious, depressed and continue our destructive chain. In severe cases, one can speak of physical or verbal violence or even murder or suicide. Crimes of passion in the worst of circumstances.

In conditions like these certainly none of the partners are satisfied and can build a relationship based on trust, respect and love.

The most important thing is to recognize that we are living in a relationship of this nature, besides that I make my links in this way. Rather than continue with the couple, it is important to ask some questions about ourselves:

I set me my relationship with a partner?

I'm an addict or addicted to love?

I'm really living in an unhealthy love?

I can not build a life with my partner, but not without it?

None other than every person in particular can answer those questions. In the depths of ourselves we know that does not suit us, we are slowly killing us, but we dare not take the step to free ourselves from our own prison, namely, not the couple, but our ways and means of relating ...

It is important to take into account how much you suffer not only with your partner, but in your personal life. I depend on others to be fine.

There are always resources to succeed, that hurts, yes, but you are also suffering in the relationship. There are ways out of this situation, just enough to have the courage.

Self-love is the most important ingredient for having the courage to leave this addiction to love. Today there are important resource, psychotherapy is a possibility.

Yes you there in addiction to love, give yourself the opportunity to live and improve the quality of your emotional life ... Think maybe love each other more worthwhile oneself ... Android app